Life After Loss
Less than a week ago we lost Bella, our tuxedo kitty. Losing our furry family can be completely devastating. One day Bella was fine, acting completely normal and the next she was sluggish, hiding/isolating from us, and sleeping ALOT. After two days I took her to the vet, the next morning I got the call that she had passed.
While I was so sad about this, I had a much harder task in front of me… Calling my 18 year old daughter (let’s call her JP) and giving her the news. You see cats pick their person. JP was Bella’s person. She slept with JP every single night. If JP was gone for an extended period of time Bella was sad and missed her so much. She would watch for her to return home and run to her yelling when she walked in the door. When JP would eat Bella would climb into her lap and sit. Their relationship was a beautiful sweet thing to see.
That night JP stayed over at a friends house. It was about 9:30 in the morning when I called. I tried to steady my voice, which if you know me, you know how difficult that is. I wear my heart on my sleeve and cannot hide my emotions. My throat seemed to constrict even tighter as the phone began to ring. I knew I was delivering the worst news to my daughter and that her heart was fixing to break into a million pieces. Knowing you’re going to inflict that kind of pain onto someone you love so much is hard to handle, at least for me. I got the news out, my voice quivered but not so bad I couldn’t speak. JP sounded numb over the phone. She didn’t react much, I assume she knew if she lost it I would too. We definitely feed of each other’s emotions.
JP got home and we went to pick up Bella’s remains. So difficult to watch your heart break down in front of you. We cried together as we buried her.
Life works in strange ways. The second day Bella was acting off we heard a cat yelling outside in the woods. The poor thing was just a kitten. When we finally found him we knew someone had driven out and just dumped him into the neighborhood. While he was very very young, we estimate five to six weeks, he wasn’t scared. He came straight to us, no fear. He didn’t hiss or spit. He didn’t run. This was not a feral cat. This was a cat that wanted to be held. That wanted attention. That played with us. He was obviously malnourished, very thin, mostly skin and bones, You could feel his spine, hips, and ribs poking through his skin. The large bloated belly of well-feed kittens was absent. He was so skinny.
We already had three inside cats and there was no way we could take in another inside cat. We were planning to keep him outside, at least at first. The day after we found the little one I took Bella to the vet. When picking her up you could tell her body temp was lower than normal. The next morning Bella had passed. I really think Bella knew what was happening and found this little guy to ease our family’s heart during this loss. This little guy is helping to heal the pain. Bella wanted to make sure JP was going to be ok. Moonshine is now an inside cat, who is spending lots of time with JP.
Today six days after the loss of our Bella Girl, I made a notebook about healing after loss. JP asked me to make a notebook for her dedicated to Bella. This evening we sat down together and made Bella Baby notebook. I will be adding the notebooks to Amazon to approval. We are still grieving but we are also healing and working through our pain.